Gossip for life

I read recently in Sapiens: The birth of humankind by Yuval Noah Harari, that humans need gossip to live in a society. We need it to develop our various languages. In fact, languages developed because of gossiping among our ancestors. Humans are the only animals who have developed complex languages. So maybe that means that we are the best gossipers in the animal kingdom.

I guess in this context, the gossip is not necessarily malicious, it is just the transfer of information from one to another or many others. Of course, when the information is a juicy secret or something unexpected it is more interesting and travels further.

There seems to be a common consensus that women gossip more than men. I used to think the same when I was younger but now, I have realized that that is not entirely true. Men love to gossip just the same or maybe even more! It is just that men tend to meet up in smaller groups or in groups that contain women. So, their gossipy contributions go slightly unnoticed. Women are usually louder, bubblier, and more talkative, so men’s voices could get drowned out. From the outside of a group conversation, the higher pitched voices of women travel further than the low monotones of men too. Trust me, everyone is equally guilty of gossiping.

Apparently gossip promotes cooperation and trust among people. When they share information in this way, they will be able to sieve out the bad eggs from the group too. I am not entirely convinced by this though. Gossip can be hurtful. I have been on the receiving end of the injury caused by gossip. Gossip spreads rumor. They spread lies. We all need to be aware of this when partaking in some gossips.

Then again, when I am with friends, gossiping is usually all that we do. We talk about other people, what they have done or said, or whom they are dating or cheated on, etc. We rarely, if ever, have traditionally “intellectual” conversations about science or philosophy. I feel embarrassed to admit this but apparently all this while, I was contributing to society with my gossips!